I got a tetanus/pertussis shot in the arm today. It hurts like a mother bitcher. I guess going on a field trip with 60 fourth graders to Missouri’s First Capitol wasn’t exciting enough, so I needed to go have a nurse jab a needle into my arm bone deep. Actually, I needed to go to the doctor for a checkup because I take a medication that requires them to see me in person every 6 months or so…no it’s not valtrex or a psychotropic. I have ADHD. I do still find it to be embarrassing to talk about it, but it is what it is and I am working it out.

I discovered I had ADHD after I discovered my son had it. I have watched my son struggle through schoolwork and homework for years. Watching him struggle has brought back my own horrible childhood memories of sitting at the dining room table after school trying to focus on my OWN schoolwork when I was a kid. I vividly remember wishing I had a white hot poker to stick through my skull because it seemed to me THAT would feel better than sitting still trying to focus on doing long division. When I was in 4th grade, I didn’t do my homework, and back in 1984 it was legal for my school principal to administer corporal punishment for that offense. Crazy huh? I was all of 45 pounds then, the size of your average kindergartner, unable to focus on completing assignments, and my school principal was authorized to hit me on the ass with a wooden paddle for it. WHAT A LOAD OF SHIT!!! Talk about embarrassment. I was the only girl I knew who ever got swats. I was a gifted child, but everyone told me I was lazy and never “lived up to my potential.” All along I could have been doing so much more…

Thankfully, nowadays they harness all the energy of cocaine and put it into a small capsule and it virtually cures ADHD. Funny thing is; when you have ADHD, you don’t react the same to ‘speed’ as you do if you are “normal.” For instance, if you don’t have ADHD and you take one of my pills, you will be balls to the wall RAILING like a crack head all day. But this medicine actually lowers my heart rate. Before I started taking this medicine I could best be described at work as a “clock watcher.” Now that I take the daily medicine I get pissed off when 5:00 rolls around because I want to stay at my desk and get shit done. A lot of adults suffer from ADHD and go untreated, but I strongly urge everyone I know who feels like they may have it to go online to any search engine and type in “I think I have ADHD” and take any quiz you come across. Who knows? Maybe you can save yourself from constant frustration like I have.

I have wanted to be a writer my entire life. Now that I have meds for ADHD, I am finally starting to write. I am not necessarily saying I want to be an inspiration to anyone, but if I am able to help anyone at all, then that person will owe me BIG TIME and I can hold that over their head forever and ever. And that is how I roll.

PS I started this blog to talk about how much of a vajayjay I am because my arm is hurting very badly, but I ended up on a completely separate issue. What more proof do you need that I have ADHD and am completely out of meds?